Chris Kemp, M.S.:
Very carefully. Everything carries some risk, so it's better to try to find ways to connect socially without adding unnecessary risk. We know enough about the virus that outdoor activities, while observing social distancing measures, are obviously much better than going to a crowded bar without a mask. If it feels risky, it is risky.
Alison Bernstein, Ph.D.:
Social isolation is not good for us. We need to find ways to have social connections while practicing good risk mitigation strategies. We know what needs to be done to allow us to be social without endangering our progress is slowing the spread.
Wearing a mask and frequent hand washing goes a long way to mitigate risk. Combined with sitting far apart if you can’t wear a mask (while eating for example), this can go a long way to mitigating risk to allow us to reconnect with friends.
An idea that is emerging is the quarantine bubble or “quaranteam,” where you talk frankly with friends about merging your bubble for a period of time. This requires trust and honesty.
Melissa Hawkins, an epidemiologist, writes about how to create your own:
First, everyone must agree to follow the rules and be honest and open about their actions. Individual behavior can put the whole team at risk and the foundation of a quaranteam is trust. Teams should also talk in advance about what to do if someone breaks the rules or is exposed to an infected person. If someone starts to show symptoms, everyone should agree to self-isolate for 14 days.
Second, everyone must decide how much risk is acceptable and establish rules that reflect this decision. For example, some people might feel OK about having a close family member visit but others may not. Our family has agreed that we only visit with friends outside, not inside, and that everyone must wear masks at all times.
Finally, people need to actually follow the rules, comply with physical distancing outside of the quaranteam and be forthcoming if they think they may have been exposed.
Additionally, communication should be ongoing and dynamic. The realities of the pandemic are changing at a rapid pace and what may be OK one day might be too risky for some the next.
This is explained in more detail in her recent article: https://theconversation.com/quarantine-bubbles-when-done-right-limit-coronavirus-risk-and-help-fight-loneliness-140134
Jack Lipton, Ph.D.:
Our mental health and our need for social interaction is extremely important. Children I’ve interacted with over the past few months — their response to isolation is deeply concerning. As we are safely able to do so, we should try to expand the group of people who can physically interact with our kids as long as they’re agreeing to some ground rules — and taking those ground rules seriously.
One of the main risks that we all take is interactions with our friends and family members whose exposure is unknown. We’ve all been isolating in place a long time, and if we want to expand our interactions, we can try to do so responsibly by making clear and defined agreements with others. My family has come up with The Circle, which sounds like it’s similar to a quaranteam.
As you make your own plan, consider that one person in a room by themselves all the time will not get sick. When you bring in another person, that person has to have a clear understanding of where they’ve been and what they’ve risked — whether it’s going to the market, an appointment, work, daycare, etc. Every person you bring into your circle should be very aware of and transparent with their personal level of interaction with others. Every person you bring in must also agree to the same precautionary practices, and every person must agree to isolate if they encounter an increased level of risk. If they cannot bring those elements to your circle, they can’t be in the circle — that’s it.
Even though it may seem too simple or awkward to do so, have a circle-wide conversation that covers the basics of the virus, the disease, the risks, and the plan.
If we get to a point where we’re regularly testing everyone, not only the symptomatic, then we won’t have to worry so much about this. Until then, figure out your circle or quaranteam. If someone wants to connect socially but they’re not able to follow the group’s rules, or you feel they’ll violate them despite agreeing to them, it’s a clear “no.” You can reconnect once it’s safer to do so.
I can’t stress enough how important it is to establish your boundaries now. In the moment is a terrible time to consider how you and your family should handle interactions during a pandemic. Defining them now will better prepare you to prepare others for when you say “no,” and it will help you have the language you need versus fumbling when it matters.